What depression is not…

Yesterday I had an appointment with my primary care doctor to discuss obtaining a prior authorization for my Adderall. During this appointment he and I discussed all of things that depression is not, and I thought it would make a good blog post. So, let’s talk about it.

  1. Depression is not feeling a little sad sometimes. Feeling sad is a totally normal human emotion. For me, depression is feeling nothingness. I can’t feel sad. Sadness is too extreme of an emotion and takes up too much of my energy. When I am in a depressive episode, any emotion is just too much. Feeling is quite literally one of the most exhausting things to even attempt to do. When this happens, a depressive episode can last for days, weeks, or months and can affect every part of my life. Sometimes, the only thing I can do is go with the flow.
  2. Depression is not only for certain people. Honestly, depression does not give a fuck who you are. Depression can affect anyone despite your race, gender, socioeconomic status, etc. Anyone can struggle with depression, and it does not have anything to do with what kind of person they are, how they grew up, or what they do for a living. Though there are aspects of life where one is more likely to struggle with depression, but these factors are not the sole reason for depression.
  3. Depression cannot be cured by drinking more water or saying positive affirmations on a daily basis. This seems like it should be common sense, but it is not. I was once told by my PCP that I could cure my depression if I just drank 3 quarts of water in the first 8 hours that I was awake. I actually attempted to do this and vomited, because that is TOO MUCH WATER for my tiny body. Drink water and do what feels comfortable for you, no need to obsess over it. Also, positive affirmations are nice, but positive thinking won’t cure depression… sometimes it makes depression worse. I know that sounds crazy, but personally when I tell myself all of these nice things while I’m in a depressive episode I just feel like I’m lying to myself and wonder what the fuck is wrong with me.

Well, there it is. Just a short list of what depression is not. Depression is such a personal experience, and no two experiences are the exact same. Even if we have the same diagnosis, it just isn’t possible to experience it exactly like another person. Know that you’re never alone and that there is always someone who is willing to listen. If you’re out there struggling, you can always send a message at the bottom of this page.

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